Our hearts are broken

Our hearts are broken. Would you pray for our sweet foster son?  He is no longer living with us, so much has happened so quickly, but we love him deeply. Through tears this morning, I thought about what E has taught us over the last 7 months…

Bonding. How is it that I could love you as fully as my own biological child, now being asked to grieve every time I see the empty car seat, walk by your dark room, find one of your little drawings? It’s because it’s not about me. God loves you so much that he allowed us to love you fully as our child so that your needs would be met, even if that led to great pain for us. And we are so thankful for that. We will love you every day of our lives, and know that it is a gift to have loved you so deeply. 

Advocacy. The night you came, God put on my heart that we were going to need to advocate for you. I never imagined the hundreds of hours on phone calls and emails that this would entail. Sometimes the person on the other end was receptive, sometimes they were annoyed, but we knew we needed to be your voice. Just because you’re not old enough to tell all these adults what you need doesn’t mean your life and your voice is any less important. We’re thankful to have been trusted with the role of advocating for you.

Life. You have shown us that life is a gift and preserving life takes great effort. At not even two years old, your life had been so affected by what you had walked through. Your little body would tense up, you would freeze and panic at the things that triggered you. Your life had scars, but it was worth every ounce of effort to see restoration taking place.

Injustice. There are so many amazing people working in child welfare. They are overworked and underpaid. They love children and families, and this is why they work in child welfare. But there are also people who are not acting ethically, and processes that cause more trauma to be placed on victims.

How could this occur? In America, in 2020? It’s way easier to ignore this reality. Stepping in is messy and painful. But if we don’t step in there will continue to be victims – light needs to be shone and anyone involved in the care of a child must be held accountable. “All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.” 

The Gospel. The fact that there is a need for foster care highlights the brokenness in the world. Sin leads to pain and victims. The chasm of pain and trauma in this realm of child welfare is massive. Our efforts fall short to bring true healing. But Jesus can do the impossible. Jesus showed lavish love to the most vulnerable. And if we know Him, we can do the same.

….if you’re reading this, I’m praying that you will step into fighting for vulnerable children in some capacity. Become a Guardian ad litem (GAL) – a thorough, invested, honest GAL can be used powerfully to protect a child. Serve on a Care Community – I can’t express the gift that this circle of people has been to us. If you want to serve in a Care Community, learn how your church can step into foster care, or give to an organization that is daily interceding for children, contact Commission 127. Or step in and become a foster family. If this is something you are stepping into, we would love to pray for you, so please reach out. 

…we love you so much E.